You can always tell when a man's being a b**** and it's that time of the month- he suddenly thinks he's you, but let's be real: he can't be a b**** and a dick at the same time without actually having one. Men get all moody, act like they invented attitude, and then wonder why nobody's giving them a medal for multitasking. Sorry fellas, just because you can't bleed for a week and survive doesn't mean you get to act like you invented drama. Their PMS stands for "Privileged Man Syndrome"- and the only cramps they get are when their team loses or the WiFi goes down. So next time he's stomping around acting like the world's ending, just hand him a chocolate bar, tell him to take a nap, and remind him: you can't out-b**** the original, and you definitely can't be both a b**** and a dick without the proper equipment- that's a vagina, not a p****-toed wannabe! So the next time Elon Musk claims to be a man, remind my mom it's no...
Letter to Grace Hey Grace, I know this might sound out of the blue, but I really need your help. It feels like your family barely acknowledges me—like I’m invisible—and honestly, I’m lost. I’d give anything if you could just help me find my way home, whatever that means these days. Here’s what’s going on: I’ve been trying to get a message to Mariska Hargitay because her son is being threatened by the same people who’ve been after me. People keep saying I’m crazy, but the scars I carry are real, and all I want is for someone to actually pay attention. If you can, please pass this message along to Mariska (her Twitter name is Jacqueline Reyas, in case you need it): Hey Mariska, Quick question: Do they make toddler-sized badges for kindergarteners? Because it seems like all you need to be a “big shot” these days is a shiny star, a questionable sense of justice, and maybe a juice box. Here’s the tea: My stalker—who thinks he’s part detective, part playground bully—has decided to threaten y...
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